How to choose incontinence underwear: a complete guide for NZ families
If you’re reading this, you’re probably looking for something that works and that feels dignified: for yourself, or for a parent, partner or grandparent you care about. That’s completely understandable. Bladder leaks are common, especially with age, after surgery, or with limited mobility. The right products can make daily life feel normal again.
You’re far from alone. Continence NZ estimates that nearly 1.1 million adult New Zealanders live with incontinence. It isn’t something you simply have to put up with, either. Continence NZ stresses that it can often be treated or better managed, and that asking for help early makes a real difference.
This guide walks through the choices in plain language, so you can find the right fit without guesswork.
It’s often about more than the bladder
Leaks aren’t always about the bladder itself. For many people, particularly with arthritis, stiff hands or after a stroke, the challenge is reaching the toilet in time and managing clothing once there. Continence NZ points to limited mobility, joint stiffness and slower dressing as common reasons for accidents.
That’s why style matters as much as absorbency. Underwear that opens at the sides, and clothes with elastic waists or Velcro fastenings, can give you the time you need. See our adaptive pants for easy-on clothing.
The main types of incontinence products
- Washable underwear with built-in absorbent layers. Soft, reusable underwear with absorbency sewn in. Some styles are everyday pull-on, and some open at the sides or front for easier dressing.
- Adaptive underwear sold as a set with an insert pad. Our one-piece adaptive underwear has adjustable straps and a full opening, so dressing is easy, and it comes with an insert pad for protection.
- Insert pads. Reusable pads that sit inside underwear for extra protection.
- Disposable products. Convenient, but a recurring cost and more waste.
- Bed, chair and pillow protection. Waterproof protectors for the furniture around the person.
Washable options are a good fit for many people with light to moderate leaks, and some of our styles are made for heavier or overnight use. For a closer look at the pros and cons, see our guide to washable vs disposable incontinence products.
Step 1: Choose the right absorbency
The best starting point is how much and how often the leaks happen:
- Light leaks (a little when sneezing, laughing or being active): insert pads at 120ml, or women’s underwear at 200ml.
- Moderate leaks (regular leaks through the day): styles at 300–360ml.
- Heavy leaks or overnight: our 500ml styles.
If you’re unsure, choose the higher level. You can always wear lighter protection on better days. For the one-piece set, the absorbency is that of the insert pad included. For more detail, read our guide to choosing the right absorbency, and see every style side by side on our incontinence collection page.
Step 2: Choose a style that suits how dressing works
Think about who is putting the underwear on, and how easy that is.
Everyday pull-on styles suit people who dress independently. Our women’s washable underwear (200ml) and premium men’s underwear (300ml or 500ml) are designed to look like normal underwear.
Front-opening boxer briefs are easier for men at the toilet. See our front-opening boxer briefs (300ml).
Two-side opening styles open flat on both sides for easier dressing and changing, which helps with limited mobility or when a carer is assisting. See two-sided opening underwear (360ml, men and women) and premium two-side opening underwear (500ml, men and women).
One-piece adaptive underwear (sold as a set with an insert pad) is a good choice when dressing is the main challenge. It has adjustable straps and a full-opening design, and fits waists from roughly 59cm to 133cm. The protection comes from the insert pad in the set. See the one-piece adaptive underwear.
Step 3: Get the fit and comfort right
A snug, comfortable fit helps underwear work well and stay discreet under clothes. Each product page has a size guide, so check it before you order. Soft, breathable cotton is also kinder on the skin, especially if the underwear is worn all day. Whichever type you choose, changing promptly when wet helps keep skin comfortable.
Because underwear can’t be returned for change-of-mind reasons (for hygiene), we’d much rather help you choose well before you buy. If you’re unsure about size or style, just get in touch and we’ll recommend the best fit.
Day and night protection
Many people find the best results come from combining products:
- Daytime: washable underwear, with an insert pad added on days when you want extra security.
- Overnight: a higher-absorbency style, plus a washable bed pad and a waterproof pillow protector, so the mattress and bedding stay protected too.
You can find the full range in our bed and furniture protection collection.
Caring for washable underwear
Washing is simple. As a general guide, use a cold, gentle cycle, and avoid tumble drying and bleach. Always follow the care label on your product, and see our Washing Instructions page for full details. Following the care instructions helps your underwear last longer.
Habits that help alongside the right products
Products are only part of the picture. These general tips come from Continence NZ:
- Keep drinking. Cutting back on fluids to avoid leaks tends to make bladder irritation worse. Ask your doctor how much is right for you.
- Watch the irritants. For some people, caffeine, alcohol and fizzy drinks make leaks worse.
- Keep bowels regular. Constipation can make bladder control worse, so fibre and fluids matter.
- Keep moving. Gentle, regular exercise helps, and a physio can suggest pelvic floor exercises.
- Make the toilet easy to reach. Think night lighting, non-slip mats and clothing that comes off quickly.
Check with your GP before changing your diet or exercise routine.
Out and about
A little planning makes outings easier. Pack a spare pair and a sealed bag for used items, and choose the absorbency level that suits the length of the day.
If you’re helping someone else, bringing this up can feel awkward. A few things tend to help:
- Choose a private, unhurried moment.
- Start with comfort and practicality, rather than the problem.
- Offer choices, so the person stays in control.
- Keep their independence and dignity front of mind.
Some practical help once you’ve started the conversation:
- Offer regular, gentle reminders to use the toilet, rather than waiting to be asked.
- Choose protection that matches how long it needs to last.
- If leaks are new, or it hurts to pass urine, ask the GP to check for an infection first.
- For bowel leaks, protect the skin and wash your hands carefully afterwards.
Many of our customers are adult children choosing for a parent, often from a distance. If you’d like help choosing, we’re happy to talk it through. And if you’re in Taranaki, you’re welcome to arrange a pickup and talk sizing in person.
Where to get help
Start with your GP, who can check for infection and refer you to a continence advisor. Continence NZ also runs a free, confidential helpline on 0800 650 659. Don’t wait if leaks are new or painful. If someone suddenly can’t pass urine at all, see a doctor or go to emergency straight away.
Frequently asked questions
Q: Can washable underwear be worn overnight?
A: Yes. Our 500ml styles are designed for heavy leaks and overnight use. For extra peace of mind, add a bed pad.
Q: Can I use an insert pad with washable underwear?
A: Yes. Our insert pad is designed to sit inside regular or incontinence underwear for extra protection.
Q: How many pairs do I need?
A: It depends on how often you change and wash. A simple starting point is enough to wear one, have one in the wash and keep one spare.
Q: Can I return underwear if it doesn’t fit?
A: Underwear isn’t eligible for change-of-mind returns, for hygiene reasons. Please see our Easy Returns page for the details, and ask us before you buy if you’re unsure.
Further reading from Continence NZ
Arthritis and bladder and bowel control
Stroke and bladder and bowel control
Caring for someone with incontinence
Go deeper
Washable vs disposable incontinence products
How to choose the right absorbency
How to wash washable incontinence underwear
Ready to shop? Browse our incontinence products or bed and furniture protection. Not sure where to start? Contact us for a personalised recommendation.